The Three Secrets of Weight Loss

The mechanics of weight loss are a mystery to me. The few times in my life that I’ve tried to lose weight—after gaining the freshman 15, and again after gaining an additional senior 15—I’ve failed miserably. Obsessing over what I’m eating and how much I’m exercising creates an urge to eat four bowls of Honey Nut Cheerios after dinner and collapse into bed, exhausted by my own disgustingness.

At my heaviest. Don’t even ask about the hats.

I fit comfortably into a once-too-tight dress yesterday, so this morning, I stepped on the scale out of curiosity. I saw a number lower than any I’ve seen since I was 18. And this was after I ate my traditional eggs-toast-n-coffee breakfast.

Sure, I’ve been running a lot, but I usually gain a few pounds while marathon training. I’ve been watching what I eat only in that I’ve glanced at my food before cramming it into my mouth.

I spent last Saturday in Astoria on a food crawl, where I consumed, in order, barbecued meats plus side dishes, beer, a mini-raspberry cheesecake, beer, pierogies and french fries, more beer, a chicken kebab, two slices of pizza, a cannoli, beer, and more beer. I began the following day at Dunkin Donuts, with a sausage, egg, and cheese sandwich on a croissant. And more beer. (OK, just kidding. I had a coffee—with cream!)

The last two times I’ve hung out with Paul’s family, his dad has introduced me to other guests by saying, “Wait until you see this girl eat.” (And I lived up to the hype, both times.) If I were hefty, that might be offensive, but I’m lighter than ever.

What’s up with this change?

I guess it’s not too mysterious. It’s less tempting to boredom-eat now that I’m not spending most evenings alone with Nermal. I’ve been cooking a lot more. I’ve cut out most simple, sugary foods—including my daily Chobani—and I crave sugar less as a result.

“Get a boyfriend who’s good in the kitchen and doesn’t like dessert” may not be the most practical weight-loss advice for everyone, but it seems to be working for me. It’s incredibly effective when paired with “start running marathons” and “never keep Honey Nut Cheerios in the house.”


About Meghan Loftus
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4 Responses to The Three Secrets of Weight Loss

  1. Lydia says:

    I thought you were going to say that beer was the secret to successful weight loss! 🙂

  2. This post cracked me up! Loved reading it. LOL. I just started trying to avoid buying any packaged/pre-made foods with more than 5 ingredients. I am a morning Chobani maniac too so I have bought plain Chobani to blend with real fruit instead of the pre-mixed kind. It is amazing all the extra crap that is in things that we don’t even realize. I’ll let you know how it goes 🙂 And we all need those crazy food fest days too. I ate McDonalds (gasp) after my half Ironman two weeks ago. Ha!

    • mgloftus says:

      That’s smart! I tried that Chobani plan but didn’t like it nearly as much without all the added sugar. Funny how that works!

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